I have been trying for months to sit down and tackle my keyboard to try and coerce some nonsense out of my brain. I believe my mind has been on hiatus longer than a new hit series featured on HBO. It was as if the harder I tried to think of something to write about ,the more the thoughts escaped and tunneled out faster than Andy Dufresne through the sewers of Shawshank. It just stinks when that happens.
It’s like I’m held prisoner in my own head and I am facing a cell block that refuses to sing a Schwann song. In order to get the synapses in sync, I usually will take long walks with my dog or tackle the Elliptical at the gym. I stress the word usually.
Lately I have found it harder and harder to get out there during the winter months, which seem to drag on longer than Holiday visits from my Mother-in Law. The motivation to dress in layers, jump into a cold car, drive in sleet , just to arrive and get out of a now warmed car into the cold, and enter a gym that smells like…like…… a gym; then strip off the soaked layers and step up onto a piece of equipment that was formally occupied by a wet Wookie………..has left the building.
As far as the long walks with my dog are concerned? He avoids nasty weather and will withhold potty-time longer than a camel craving an oasis.
A lot of my inspiration would attack me at random times. Times when I didn’t have anything handy to jot the idea down. This frequently happens while driving to the store and circling the parking lot for a space, at the same time, averting run- a -way grocery carts searching for a head on.
One time was in a bank as I stood eleventh in line during rush hour. I found myself digging through my bottomless pit of a purse for a pen.
A PEN I always carry in the zipper portion of a pocketbook which inevitably gets devoured by the hand bag monster lying in the abyss below the hole in fabric lining.
A PEN that sits there in clutch camo teasing the grasp of my pre -arthritic fingers ,sticking it’s partially opened tip out leaving it’s mark on my manicure to let me know it’s” there “and “unattainable at the moment”.
A PEN that refuses to surrender by the time I reach the front of the line to make my deposit; In addition, the bank employee reprimands me to sign the check and offers me a pen. There I stand with a Pen and Teller and “No Vacancy” written all over my brain…
And as fate will have it, my thought for the day had vanished ,only to possibly resurface during another inopportune moment. Much like that PEN of inequity did when it decided to show itself as I returned to my car outside the bank. Never walk and blindly fish for keys in an open receptacle whilst trying to recapture your initial brainstorm, it leads to a dropped hand bag adjacent to the car door causing an accessories crisis spill onto the the black top and watching a PEN that is mightier than my satchel, to roll under the car.
I got down on all fours to locate its final destination. I tried to retrieve that slippery shut in, but it was out of my reach and I risked bumping heads with a header pipe……and that would exhaust me…….
Gathering ideas to stimulate a blog thought is not an easy task and can prove to be hazardous depending on your surroundings at the time. I’ve had many afflatus attack me in the middle of a shampoo while showering. Maybe scrubbing the scalp stimulates that a fore mentioned “cell ” block and whips a body out of the bath, dripping without a towel, sliding towards a pen spotted on the countertop……only to land on the cold tile floor in the process.
Which brought my brain to a conclusion that all ideas brought on during that scenario are………….
(wait for it)……..
SLIPPERY WHEN WET.
spread the humor.